Category: Dating and Relationships
I've been curious for quite some time about how a visual person finds a date who is visually Impaired. I noticed there really are no dating sites on the net specific for this. I was hoping there was some type of group in my area of Colorado Springs that has this sort of thing in mind, But if it's out there I can't find it.
I'll admit, It might be a little out of the ordinary for a guy to go looking for a date like this. I suppose part of the reason is I like being the protector or the white night as some might call it. But I'm not looking to find someone Non-Visual just for that reason. I also want to find someone who I can connect with as well as find true love with.
Also, I know this post is oriented towards dating but I'm also up to making friends who are non-visual as well! So feel free to message me if you'd like to get to know me ether way!
I'm open to anyone's thoughts and opinions so feel free to post anything that comes to mind regarding my discussion.
Well, this is creative. Most of us just say "hey, I'm horney, who wants to screw?" Then we nonvisual folks feel around until we find each other and get after it.
Must admit your approach is more genteel. Good luck.
Bob
Some times I wish I felt that way but that's not how I work. I guess I just don't understand the world in general. The world tells the people what to think and the people think it.
People are told that all they want is sex and they should accept that fact, So every one blindly follows that idea.
I'm not looking for a person so we can screw, If I wanted that I'd just hop on Craig's list and call the girl of my choosing.
it is very hard to say where you'll fine someone to fall in love thats visually impaired.
sighted and visually impaired couple that date usually meet in social event or place that you spend most time in such as university, colleges, workplace etc, etc.
just out of curiosity... any particular reason why you looking to date a visually impaired girl?
Believe it or not, I really would post on Craigslist if I were you. There are sections there for friendship as well as for long-term dating. It's not all for sex. Also, most of us just say blind or visually-impaired, not nonvisual and visual. *smile* Just remember to treat her like you would anyone else. Many times, we get defensive or upset if people try to do too much for us or try to treat us as if we're helpless. Everyone's tolerance level on this is different, so it would be a good idea to ask her right off the bat what she's okay with and what will get on her nerves. General rule of thumb is to always ask before you do something. You should see if there are any general blindness groups around. Perhaps, you can volunteer at one and meet someone that way. Keep us posted.
To be brutally honest I would question the motives of someone who deliberately set out to look for a visually impaired date.
I can understand that a visually impaired person might deliberately set out to find a sighted partner, in order to feel they fit in with society, that they were also a part of the sighted word etc, but I really can't see it the other way round, and I would wonder if someone looking specifically for a visually impaired partner (or anyone with another disability for that matter) was potentially looking for someone knowing that they might be vulnerable and wanting to exploit that. Call me scinical if you like..
well you could start by putting things in your profile. and i agree with sugarbaby kinda. kinda interesting. i'd like to think it's just like someone being interested in blondes, fat girls, skinny girls, black, white, hispanic..but its different.
it is different though. And there is also a difference between a sighted person meeting and falling in love with someone with a disability, and a non diisabled person purposefully setting out to find someone with a disability.
Seriously if I were on the dating scene and someone indicated that they specifically wanted a blind partner I would run a mile.
haha i just had a funny thaught, if a sighted girl liked you would you not wanna date her cuz she wasn't blind? just wondering
It is a bit unconventional but it could also be a fetish like how some people like short people, fat people etc. I mean, I love much older men, but I'm certainly not interested in them for money or cause they're vulnerable. I just like them.
Another brutally honest point I'd like to make and which I'm sure many others would agree with: I lost interest as soon as I saw the word "protector".
That is all.
Becky
Yeah, I'm curious as well. Are you just looking for a visually impaired girl? Is that what you specifically want?
ugh what a creton!
Yeah, "protector" kind of rubbed me the wrong way too. But maybe he just doesn't know the right way to say what he feels, I mean, how to put it into words. That, or he really is confused and sees us as helpless. Guess we'll just have to wait for a response.
Dang you guys are funny! Maybe I should be offended but I'm actually enjoying this. Let me clear some things up.
First of all when I used the word protector I was thinking along the lines as someone was trying to take advantage of her blindness or she got lost somewhere and need help getting back. (Just the other day there was a blind man in the middle of highway traffic because he lost his way) I mean dang maybe I'd open the door every once in a while but I expect a person to be able to take care of them selves and not need watching or anything of the sort. And I need taking care of sometimes to! haha
And that I want to take advantage of someone because they were blind or disabled?...... HAHAHAHAHA Why would they have to be blind or disabled? Call me clinical if you'd like but there are so many people out there to take advantage of I wouldn't have to go looking if I wanted one.
I guess I'd say I think it would be interesting to date a blind person that's all. Maybe partly a fetish because the idea of dating a blind person does kinda turn me on.. lol But no I'm not that strange that I don't date sighted people. Maybe I'm just sick of stuck up sighted people that I want to see If I can find someone who's not such a monster.
I think I made a mistake by making my first post so polite and nice sounding didn't think you all would be so ruthless *Wink*
I'd love to know what you all are picturing me as now? Just for fun I'm going to give a brief description about myself.
I'm a 21 year old male In the United States Army, I've been In for 3 years and have made a very successful career out of it so far. But in two years I plan on getting out and continuing college with my college bonus. I grew up in Albany, NY where most of my family still lives.
I'm a VERY active person,I like anything outdoors related but when I say active I mean I like doing something at all times even If it's watching a movie with someone. And one day I thought it would be an interesting experience to date a blind person so I posted on this site.
Ok enough of my mindless rambling! I cant wait to read all of your response's *BIG Smile*
Seems as if I've heard this sort of rederick before? *cringe*
i think i understand, he's right about the blind taking advantage of thing. i know enough girls who get taken advantage of all the time and their sighted. I'm not even gonna ask why it turns you on because i guess it'd make as much sense to me why some guys get turned on by feet. lol
I'll leave it be, It was a fun thread but everyone got the wrong idea haha
There was a time when people didn't have to worry about people trying to take advantage of each other, Everyone was polite and trusted each other. I need to update my thinking a little it seems.
Well, people make mistakes. I think that it's cool that you have an interest in blind people, and that you someday want to date one. Just be careful about doing too much for them because they do get irritated when that happens. Otherwise, good luck!
>"There was a time when people didn't have to worry about people trying to take advantage of each other, Everyone was polite and trusted each other"
To which I say, bullshit. Throughout history there have always been some people that were good and honest people. There have also been plenty that weren't. There have always been people who have been the ones that were discriminated against, or thought of as lower class, or those that were "those people." The "who" of that group have changed from era to era, but they've always been there. If you really think that this isn't true, go read some better history books.
amen to the last poster.
in response to the original poster of the topic, what a creep!!! agreed with sb 100%.
I don't really see this as particularly creepy, in fact I second everything in post 19. Good luck.
i agree with steve, its not creepy in my opinion. Good luck mate, just don't look for some one, wait until they turn up. and just be careful with the way you go about it, if you do that, you'll be just fine.
I really don't think this is creapy one bit. I do think you might want to get more experience with a blind person. meaning getting to know us a bit more...
It doesn't seem creepy to me either. I think the first poster did a good job of explaining himself. He didn't just say straight up "I want to date a blind girl" and/or "where can I find a blind girl"; he explained why, (which seemed more to do with his personality rather than "because blindness is interesting), and also that he was willing to have just friends.
To the first poster, good luck and I also agree with what post 19, 23, and 24 said.
how is this creepy? Its a preference. Its no creepier than tif saying she loves older guys. Nothing wrong with it, not my cup of tea, but nothing wrong with it.
to the orriginal poster, I don't think everyone on here was trying to judge you, just understand what you were looking for. I will say this though, be careful. get to know a few blind people for who they really arre. Most blind people do not want to known as a blind person, just a person. the ones that do want to be known as a blind person, you really don't want to date, trust me on that one.
Also, try not to use the word protector. I know what you were talking about, I'm the same way, but that isn't protecting, that is sheltering. the hard cold truth about being blind, and one of the first ones we learn, is that our life sucks and there is nothing to do about it. the word you should use is supporter. Don't be the shield in front of the girl, be the ropes she leans on when she's taken a few rounds to the vest. If you know what I mean. Trust me, a girl, especially most blind ones, will thank you a lot more for being there afterwards, rather than for keeping her from getting hurt.
As for all the other people, cut him some slack, he's sighted, he doesn't know what its like to be blind. Show a little understanding.
It certainly is creepy. If someone was attracted to me simply because of blindness, I would be very concerned about what it is that they perceive me to be.
If one is attracted to men only when they are much older, or women only when they have a certain shoe size, things are getting a little weird. It means that you are seeking a relationship with an object rather than a person.
As for this statement “the hard
cold truth about being blind, and one of the first ones we learn, is that our life sucks and there is nothing to do about it.” It’s absolutely absurd.
Certainly there are those who have things worst than others, but this is true for everyone...
When you are blind, your life does not suck. Your opportunities may suck, your situation may suck, and if you truly have no power with which to create change, then perhaps it can lead to thinking this way, but this is not true for everyone.
One of the first things I learned had nothing to do with life sucking. What I learned was that if you don’t move, the rest of the world will push and drag you out of the way.
Back to the original poster. You probably would have gotten better responses if you had just said something like:
Hi, I’m so and so, and I’d love to meet someone new. I love gum drops and candy canes, I live in a tree house in such and such, and hope to meet someone who likes to throw back a couple of beers once in a while. For those who are curious, I am sighted.
Hope to get to know you guys,
Suspicious character
Well, you get the picture……
the only problem with that is, I was explaining it to a sighted person, you have to put it in as straight forward a way as possible or people who have never experienced it, won't understand as readily. I taught many sighted people, you can try to be as detailed as possible. You can say that certain things about being blind are bad, but it has its upside too; they won't get it. Its much easier to just say, it sucks, they get that.
I've been away so haven't read these until now. Definitely not creepy. He dates sighted people just as I've been with younger men and probably will again at some point. But he and I know what attracts us respectively and that's what we're seeking. What's the sense in beating around the bush when you know what you want? Sure, his wording may be a little strange to us, but, as so many have said, he's not blind. I think it's always best to let someone explain themselves before jumping on them. That, and the world has gotten way too politically correct lately.
ditto to what ok sure said...especially the first part.
Saying that being blind sucks is not putting things as straight forward as possible.
Being blind does not suck. the attitude that being blind sucks, is what actually sucks.
As for knowing what you like, that is not quite the argument. I know what type of women I am atracted to, but that just means that I recognize my preference when it comes to women, not that I want a girl who fits a particular mold.
For example, I like girls who are a little off.
However, If I ssaid that I wwanted to date someone who has possibly had a nervous breakdown, or who is in therapy, or who is depressed.... Well that would be a different story.
And there is a good reason why we have political correctness. It means that everyone can have a voice.
Well, I see two sides to this one; however, I'm going to have to agree that this was not creepy. There is nothing wrong with what Taylor said, and yes, his wording is a little strange, but that's because he's not used to being around blind people. So what would you say for the opposite? If I were to say that I want to date a sighted person, what would you say on that? Personally, I don't care who I date, sighted or blind, as long as they have a good personality that fits my beliefs. In other words, I'm a Christian, so I would want to date a Christian. Just a little food for thought.
well everyone i guess shut him down, so don't think he'll be back to read this. lol
lol.
Protector? What a pathetic advert for abortion you are Taylor J.
Being blind sucks? What a nearly as pathetic advert for abortion you are Cody. Being blind probably does suck if you have a whining pity party atitude. Being left handed would suck if you had the same atitude about that. Maybe Taylor J could protect you.
My goodness, you guys are as harsh as YouTube commenters. I wish that the posting order had been reverse, so that perhaps Taylor J could have red the comments beyond 19.
I don't understand why the first batch of comments were so convinced that he was automatically a creeper. Have any of you held an actual conversation with him? When you think of all the guys on here that try to pretend that they aren't creepy, versus someone that is openly expressing a particular preference? What gives anyone the right to jump all over him?
Aren't there boards with people saying that they only date visually impaired people? Yet, that isn't strange?
A relationship is a relationship. Be it with an older person, a person in a wheelchair, etc etc.
I'm sure Taylor has his reasons for wishing to date a girl that is visually impaired, for reasons that are his own, and if he wishes to further elaborate, then let him, if not, then get to know him, and perhaps his reasons might reveal themselves to you.
Not to sound sappy, but I never approve of people jumping on others for something as petty as relationship preference.
There's my two cents.
I feel as a blind person, who happens to be reading this particular thread, that I am in a sense, being compared to a sort of alien, or foreign group of people.
Tear Drop, what do you mean?
The above could be taken in many different ways.